Future Husband

so sometimes we get letters from our long lost loves. once a month we'll post one of these special pieces for the less fortunate in love, to share it around, you know. because that kind of thing is really nice. here it is:


Dear Jessica Blayney,

I stumbled upon your posters with a friend one Tuesday night, while inflicting our own smiles across this city. And were it not for your bit of blue paper, my hunger pangs may have destroyed Tokyo in three months or so.

As far as the boy on the bus, I do not know him - nor do I ever want to. He had the bone structure of a Yiddish dictator or some other maniacal gremlin, he seemed the kind of guy who would pass time listening to Nickelback and torturing small vermin (or orphans on his better days).

Other than that, the city was quite bland for a few nights there... A lost bird, a place to rent, some guitar lessons from some college-dwelling cunt... then there were us... beautiful us, spinning stickytape symphonies on Surry Hill lamp posts. Wrapping tape around telegraph poles like pythonic, PVC hugs.

I dream of being with you... Dancey dancey'ing with you down the aisle at a Dune-themed wedding. You wore all-black and I was wearing your mother's favourite church frock... the frills tickled the backs of my necks so much that I ruined the lovely vows you wrote for me.

Your posters compliment me like homelessness and sherry... I'm sure I'll see you out there once more...
We'll swap tales and tape over a tipple of tuaca.

Until then, your wobbly writing and fine choice of paper will foxtrot through my Saigon dreams.

All my love,
George Bannister